Breakups are hard, but it’s vital to remember that how you deal with yourself after one is just as important as how you deal with the breakup itself. Knowing what things not to do after a breakup will help you get through this trying moment in your life as smoothly as possible. This blog article will go through 11 things you should not do following a breakup. These advice can help you cope with the loss of a relationship and move on to the next chapter in your life, from avoiding social media to recognizing that it’s OK to take some time for yourself.
Things Not To Do After A Breakup
1. Do Not Call, Text, Email, Or Show Up At Their Door
It might be difficult to resist the want to contact your ex after a split, but it is critical that you do not. Trying to maintain touch with them would just make it more difficult for you to move on and let go of the relationship. It may also be painful to your ex, making them feel like you’re clinging to them or guilty. If you truly want to stay in touch with them, wait a few weeks or even months before contacting them. This will allow you both time and space to recover and decide how to proceed.
2. Do Not Dial/Text/Email Them While Drunk
It’s common to feel lonely or unhappy after a breakup, and while reaching out to your ex may be appealing, avoid the desire. Drinking alcohol and calling your ex might result in an emotional hangover that is worse than the physical one. Even if you believe you know exactly what you want to say to them, the alcohol may drive you to say something you later regret. When your emotions are running high, take a step back and avoid all kinds of communication with your ex, especially if it involves drinking.
3. Do Not Stalk Them Online
Checking their social media to see what they are up to after the breakup might be tempting. However, this will only make matters worse. Stalking them online will not help you get over your breakup or provide closure – it will just make you feel worse. Not only that, but knowing you’re following their every move might make them feel uneasy.
It’s critical to take a break from social media and avoid monitoring their pages entirely. Unfollow them, delete their phone number, and avoid thinking about them too much. This is the most effective method to move on and begin healing from your breakup.
4. Avoid Posting About The Breakup On Social Media
When you’re suffering through a breakup, it might be tempting to turn to social media. After all, it’s simple to express your annoyances or sentiments to the rest of the world. However, this can swiftly backfire and worsen the breakup.
When you post about your breakup on social media, you’re allowing everyone to peer into your personal life. Your friends, family, coworkers, and even strangers may see your post and pass judgment on you. If your ex sees it, they may believe you’re attempting to provoke a fight or embarrass them.
Furthermore, your post may have unforeseen repercussions. People may take sides and fuel your argument with your ex. Or they may be put in the unpleasant situation of having to select one of you to support.
If you feel the urge to discuss your breakup, seek out to close friends or family instead. They will be far more suited to provide you with the assistance you require without provoking unnecessary online drama.
5. Do Not Try To Befriend Them Right Away
Breakups are never easy, and it’s normal to want to keep in touch with your ex. However, it’s vital to remember that friendships vary from romantic relationships in that they require time to build. Trying to be friends with your ex immediately may only lead to disappointment and heartbreak. Allow yourself time to grieve and digest the breakup before attempting to make new friends.
This will allow you to examine what you truly want from the relationship and how to proceed in the healthiest way possible.
Furthermore, involving a third party to help smooth the shift from relationship to friendship can be advantageous since they can bring perspective that both parties may not be able to perceive on their own.
6. Avoid Engaging In A Rebound Relationship
It might be tempting to leap into a new relationship to fill the vacuum left by a breakup, but it’s crucial to take some time for yourself before entering into another serious commitment. A rebound relationship will not help you heal from your prior trauma and can frequently cause more damage than good. Because they are based on unresolved emotions rather than compatibility and connection, rebound relationships are frequently short-lived.
Furthermore, if your ex learns about your new relationship, it may lead to even more conflict between the two of you. Before entering another relationship, it is advisable to spend some time alone and get to know yourself better.
7. Avoid Trying To Make Them Jealous
After a breakup, it’s natural to feel wounded and furious, but that doesn’t mean you should try to make your ex jealous. This comes seem as petty and immature, and it will not assist you in the long term. Even if you want revenge against your ex, there are healthier and more constructive methods to do it. Instead of attempting to make them jealous, concentrate on yourself and how you can progress.
Spend time with friends, try out new activities, or simply rest and unwind. Making your ex jealous may appear to make you feel better, but in reality it will only lead to more pain and frustration.
8. Do Not Subject Them To The Silent Treatment
It might be tempting to stop communicating with your ex after a breakup. While it’s reasonable that you don’t want to talk to them, the silent treatment is not an option. Giving them the silent treatment sends the impression that you don’t care about their feelings. This can lead to even more disagreement and animosity, and will almost certainly do more harm than good in the long run.
Instead, make an effort to express your emotions properly and respectfully. Don’t be scared to inform your ex that you need distance, but keep being respectful and discussing your thoughts in the meantime. This will assist both of you in moving on in a more positive manner.
9. Do Not Trash Talk Them To Your Friends
After a breakup, it might be tempting to seek comfort and validation from your friends. However, instead of speaking negatively about the other person, keep the dialogue focused on you and your thoughts. Trash talking your ex will not make you feel any better in the long run and it may have consequences if that person discovers what you said.
Instead, concentrate on expressing your emotions and discussing ways to make yourself feel better, such as engaging in activities you like or trying something new. If the breakup has left you feeling overwhelmed, speaking with a professional counselor or therapist may be beneficial.
10. Do Not Try To Sabotage Their New Relationship
Attempting to sabotage your ex’s new relationship is one of the worst things you can do after a breakup. Taking revenge in this manner may appear to be a wonderful idea, but it is actually a very poor one. It will not only make you appear spiteful and immature, but it will also do more harm than good. It’s best to ignore the circumstance and attempt to be happy for them.
It’s crucial to realize that fighting back against your ex for moving on is pointless. Attempting to ruin their new relationship will just prolong your own recovery and keep you from achieving closure. Instead of focusing on getting even with them, concentrate on coming to terms with the breakup and allowing yourself to recover. Put all of your focus into yourself and leave others alone to enjoy their lives.
11. Don’t Wallow In Your Sorrow
It’s easy to become depressed after a breakup. It’s natural to feel upset and lonely, and it’s acceptable that you want to mourn your loss. But don’t get caught up in self-pity or wallowing in your misfortunes. This will just aggravate the discomfort and impede your recovery.
Instead, concentrate on positive things and make an effort to look forward to the future. You may do this by surrounding yourself with people who care about you and participating in things that make you happy. Spend time with friends, take up a new hobby or or join a class, look for a new job, or volunteer. These activities might assist to give you a sense of purpose and keep you busy while you recover from the agony of the breakup.
Remember that your life is still valuable and that, regardless of what transpired between you and your ex, you are still deserving of love and happiness. Even if it’s difficult right now, try to keep your head up and look on the bright side of life.
Breaking up with someone is never easy, but it doesn’t have to be a total disaster. Remember to give yourself time to analyze your feelings and exercise self-care. Don’t make the error of doing any of the 11 things listed above. Instead, concentrate on finding healthy methods to deal with the breakup and go on with your life.